Mr R does not like creamy sauces so I was almost certain that he wouldn’t like this most festive of drinks. When I asked if he liked Eggnog, he said, “It’s like that avocado stuff, isn’t it?” By which he meant Advocaat of course. And yes, it is like that Advocaat stuff. A bottle of which used to hang around for months after Christmas when I was a nipper and does the same at Silver Screen Suppers Towers too. Because I do love me a Snowball!

The Snowball is the stuff of legends in my family. It is tradition that when I turn up at my parents’ house on Christmas Eve and my dad asks me if I’d like a drink, I always ask for a Snowball. One year about 10 years ago he forgot to buy Advocaat and we have never let him forget it.

I wanted something Christmassy for December’s recipe of the month and I’ve been eyeing up Robert Mitcham’s Eggnog recipe for a few years. Actually, I’ve been eyeing up Robert Mitcham himself for a few years too.

Robert Mitcham says this about his Eggnog, “This recipe will make five quarts. I make no apology for the excessive quantity on the theory that only a dope would go to the trouble for less.” Five quarts is almost 5 litres. Well, at the moment, with no house visitors allowed there is no hope of drinking 5 litres of Eggnog by myself.

OR IS THERE?

So I took a look at Jean Seberg’s recipe, wondering if I could scale it down and make an individual version for a little treat for me myself and I?

Jean’s recipe makes 2 and 1/2 GALLONS which by my reckoning is over 9 litres. WHAT?! How many people did Jean have over for Christmas?!

OK, I am going to do some more maths. A recipe on the BBC website makes 1.5 litres of eggnog and serves 12. So that is 125ml of eggnog per person. Jean’s 2.5 American gallons (I just discovered they are different to UK gallons) = 9463 ml. Divided by 125ml = 75 servings.

JEAN! Why on earth would you supply a recipe to the Motion Picture Mothers cookbook that serves SEVENTY FIVE PEOPLE?!

How many mere mortals buying this book would have 75 glasses in their cupboards? What kind of huge bowl would you mix over 9 litres of eggnog in? Even if we hired the glasswear and industrial sized mixing bowl how many of us could fit 75 people in our abodes for a standup festive eggnog followed by a conga?

Could someone knit this jumper for me please?

I need to sit in a dark room with a cosy sweater on for a while to get over the whole idea of more than 2 people getting together in the same room and touching each other. I am including Jean’ recipe in the hope that NEXT Christmas the pandemic will be over and someone will throw a party for 75 people, make a huge vat of Jean’s Eggnog and invite me over.

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